pearling ideas. Some of which seem slightly counter intuitive but most of which are faultlessly constructed. Ignoring a late plea from a captain of one of the Saturday sides who is a bowler to help with some
ideas on captaincy this weeks episode steers clear of cricket. It is in fact a compendium of wonderful ideas and great conversation starters on rainy days.
Interesting thought number 1, the baked bean bean bag.
Now the students amongst our number may be fortunate enough to have regular bean bags in their living areas. For those that don’t know bean bags are generally made of a textile material and contain round objects which may or may not necessarily be beans. The generally appear comfortable but rarely are. Thinking about this as well as the odd sounding but great in practice ‘water bed’ led me to think about the possible hybrid, the baked bean bean bag. This would combine the versatility of a bean bag with the comfort of a water bed. It would also provide opportunity for a handy snack in the event of severe laziness. This would require a tap to be inserted or possibly a 2 way valve. All in all I still can’t comprehend why such a great invention has not yet appeared on the market.
Interesting thought number 2, could a fish survive in custard?
Again, another of life’s great mysteries and unless there is something rather wrong with you not something that can really be found by experiment. Hence we have to rely on theory, and as with all theory
this can be based heavily on conjecture. Now as you’re probably aware fish rely on oxygen in water to survive. As you’re probably also aware water is a key component of custard, hence there should be no problems there. Obviously custard is also jam packed with goodness and in my humble opinion would provide ample nutrients for a fish. There are a few key problems to consider however, firstly the surface tension of custard would most probably be strong enough to prevent good oxygen absorption, a problem that can easily be resolved by the addition of a bubble machine. Secondly and perhaps more pertinently what temperature should the custard be. Too cold and it will set – unless the presence of the fish continuously stirs it which could happen. Too hot however and you’ll kill the fish.
All in all studies have shown that a temperature of about 40 degrees centigrade should stop the custard from setting whilst at the same time be bearable for some tropical fish to survive. If the custard wasn’t
too thick I’d definitely give the fish an even money chance of survival. But please please please do not try to find this out!
Interesting thought number 3, How many legs has a frog?
An ongoing dilemma. Most biologists will argue irrefutably that a frog has 4 legs. However the simpleton in me and also the man that likes such a high brow debate definitely classifies a frogs ‘front legs’ as
arms. To me you see legs should be used in propelling the animal forward but whilst I concede that occasionally a frog uses his arms to balance on nearly all the propulsion is given by the legs at the rear.
A frog having 2 arms and 2 legs also fits in much better with the image I have of eager frogs carrying useful titbits with their arms as they hop along merrily.
Interesting thought number 4, The long thin car.
The second great invention in this compendium. In an era when concerns are raised about congestion, pollution and the fact roads are nearing capacity serious thought needs to go into the future. Currently our public transport system is inadequate and road building schemes will never meet demand. Hence why not sell long thin cars and ban current cars from the roads. A long thin car seats all passengers in a straight line behind the driver. It can be constructed to any length required within reason seating up to 7. By banning all ‘standard’ cars to prevent people who haven’t yet realised they’re obsolete from the roads significantly more spaced will be freed up. A standard road instantly becomes a dual carriageway. A 4 lane motorway now has 8 lines. Simple fluid mechanics should be enough to tell you that in congested areas this will cut journey times in half. It’s not just genius, it is going to save the world!
Happy Thinking,
Onefa
